Influence: Establish a Rapport With People

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To be able to influence is quite important in our lives. Right from an early age we get influenced by our parents and we also learn to influence them in return. Eventually, our ability to influence others comes to shape our lives. This article explores a number of methods that helps you to influence others.

Humans are social creatures and a lot of their lives are defined by the interaction they have with each other. This interaction is highly subject to being able to influence others to our bidding. Right from an early age we get influenced by our parents and we also learn to influence them in return. Eventually, our ability to influence others comes to shape our lives. This article explores a number of methods that helps you to influence others.

 


Ask Open Questions

People don’t tell you everything they have in mind. They expect encouragement and interest by the other person. You can show this by asking them open questions. Open questions, as opposed to closed questions, lead to increased information exchange and are a great way to open up a conversation. As a rule of thumb ask questions starting with the following words to get open questions: Why, When, What, Where, Who and How.

Make Clear Statements

One reason why you may fail to influence others is when they don’t understand what you wanted them to do. Hence, don’t make vague requests that are subject to misinterpretation or let the other person deliberately misunderstand them. Make a clear statement, followed by open questions to test the knowledge of the other person. Remember, the meaning of a communication is the response you get.

Think Win/Win

Don’t always think about wining on your own. Include others and think of win/win situations. You will find that is easier to get others accept your terms when there is something for them too. As the saying is, if you win too many times, no one would want to do any deal with you.

Promise a Lot, Deliver a Lot More

This is the standard practice in business dealings, earning forecasts, project outcome, etc. and for a good reason; it works. When you promise beyond someone’s expectation they become impressed and assume that there is a possibility that you won’t make it. When you break your own expectation and forecast, you will look like God. They are much more likely to believe in you and accept your wisdom in the future.

Think of What Others Need

Everyone needs something. We value things very differently and something that is valuable to a person might be nothing to you. By understanding this disparity, you can start to influence others by giving them what they want without costing you too much. Satisfying other’s needs is a great way to motivate people and influence them.

Listen Before You Talk

Much has been said about the importance of listening, but it is still not enough. Most people don’t listen and they suffer as a result. If you listen to others, you start to see the world from their point of view and you can better see their specific needs. In turn this allows you to satisfy them accordingly. A person who feels has been listened to will be more inclined to tell you about himself and share his world with you. This makes it a lot easier for you to influence him.

Show off the Benefits

Clearly state the benefits of the action you want the other person to do so they know what’s in it for them. Usually, you have thought about the request a lot more than them, especially if you have prepared for the conversation beforehand, so they are likely not to see all the benefits straight away. By bringing the benefits to their attention you increase the likelihood of influencing them.

Churches have big Influence on People


Don’t Attack Personalities

Always focus on specific acts, task, roles and jobs, but not personalities. A generalised attack on the personality of a person or even other people produces a very different kind of conversation and generally has a negative effect on your image. If you show that you are the kind who easily attacks personalities, they can easily imagine that you may talk negatively of them behind their back. This reduces their trust in you and your ability to influence them. Hence, always talk positively of others and avoid negative gossip. This may be difficult for some people who are too used to gossiping, but there is simply no way to become a likable person if you have a reputation to talk behind everyone’s back and be the centre of gossiping in an organisation.

 

Personal influence never stops – for better or for worse. We influence others, and they influence us, in some cases even beyond death. Memories of a deceased parent, teacher,preacher, or mentor continue to dwell with us; in fact,their influence may actually increase with time.

 

A great way to get people master the art of influencing is to train them on Influence Skills using training exercises and interactive scenarios in a training classroom. In addition, trainers who like to teach people influence skills can take advantage of Influence Skills Training Materials which contains slides, workbooksFree Articles, course notes and exercises to quickly setup a course and teach the subject.

 

Bénédicte Lin - Brussels, Paris, London, Seoul, Tokyo, New York, Taipei
Bénédicte Lin – Brussels, Paris, London, Seoul, Tokyo, New York, Taipei